Hello,
I'm glad I could help ;) This is a really nice chapter and I'm glad to see that it is longer than the previous two!
But there is one thing I didn't get: do Inu and Yasha somehow know they have once been one? What exactly is their relationship?
I hope the gang will not find a solution soon, insted it would be nice if you would continue to focus on the two children: who of them will develop faster, who is more clingy, who will feel the need to protect the other, or will they be rivals? ... stuff like that ...
I hope there will also be a lot of fighting for Kagomes attention ;)
I really see forward to your next chapter!
VS (Chapter 1) - Wed 28 Mar 2018
I forgot to mention before: as far as I remember Puritysan was volunteering for being a Beta not so long ago...try to message her. There is also a section for authors who need a Beta, or volunteer to be one, in the Doguka Forum.
Good luck!
VS (Chapter 2) - Wed 28 Mar 2018
Hello,
first of all congratulations!!! It's absolute refreshing to read about a completely new idea! I have to say that I don't remember reading about a similar plot! Therefore I would like this story to not be abandoned, like so many others...
Honestly I find your writing style good, you do not need to hesitate and be afraid of what we would think, just keep going on ;)
The only suggestion I have: try to stay in the past forms, you switch between present and past forms...
I look forward to your next update!
Nicole (Chapter 2) - Fri 23 Mar 2018
Nice please update soon
I knew this would be a good story. I hope you find a beta reader. Your chapters have been good and clearly express what you want your readers to know. I'm looking forward to your next chapter.
Update soon onegai
Ja ne
Aw! I just adore these kinds of stories where he's changed to a cute little boy. I'm curious to see how the little human inuyasha is going to act.
This sounds like it's going to be an awesome story! I can't wait to see what you have in store for us!
Natalia (Chapter 1) - Sun 18 Mar 2018
Interesting idea never read it before! will be waiting for more
good luck!
Good first chapter Good luck I will be looking for the next chap please update soon.
Page 2 of 2
| | | | | | | | |