| i love this idea keep it going, it flows reallyy well
       
Blair- Thu 15 May 2008 
| i like it keep going
       
G.- Mon 12 May 2008 
I love this story! dont tell yourself you are a bad auther! (sp?) any ways, this story shows lots of potentiontal and I believe that if this is you first story than good for you!  This is a very good first chapter, especally if you do nothave somone to beta it.  I can nly encourage you to keep writng and you will get even better.  Although some parts were kinda rough, and the scene change was a bit aquard, the story and you writting style will get even better.  Also, everyone is in character (well I thought Kikyo was a bit ooc but she bacally came in then left so I see no real issue)  The only thing I could see people complain about is the chapter length, but for you first chapter it is really good
 
 Ja Ne!
 G.
      
jp- Sun 11 May 2008 
| this is very good. it has good flow. just needs a proof reader to fix spelling and grammer. other then that it is a nice story. can't wait for part 2.  bye for now ^-^ jp
       
										
									
									
																										
								
								
								
																								
															
													
					
				
								
				
				
			
				
				
		
				
	
			
			
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