Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.‘
Author's Note: This story is best read with the song My Valentine by Martina McBride playing in the background. I do not own the song.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Lingering Scents
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
He entered their bedroom looking around it. Memories of their time together began to rush through him. He will never forget her. He just can’t. He turned on the stereo and the song played was their song.
‘My Valentine by Martina McBride…’
If there were no words
No way to speak
I would still hear you
He walked over to their wardrobe and pushed open the door. Her lingering scent on the clothes was still there like she had just worn it yesterday. He fiddled with the sleeve of one of her favorite shirts and took a sniff out of it.
‘Sunshine…’
She always smells of sunshine to him. His wonderful mate and mother to his children, Kagome. He clenched his teeth at the thought of her. ‘It’s just too soon.’
He stepped into the wardrobe and sat in it. The scent of her was overwhelming him. His heart constricted with pain. He felt so alone now. Only the scent of her can give him comfort. Light whimpers can be heard from him as he recounted all the moment he had with her from the day they met.
If there were no tears
No way to feel inside
I'd still feel for you
He met Kagome in the university where he was working at and she being one of his students. Her cheerful nature and upbeat personality intrigued him. The first time he saw her, she was wearing a ridiculous yellow shirt that never fail to remind him of a duck. She sat at the front roll and she enjoyed asking him question about everything and he found it to be very annoying.
He remembered commenting her about the shirt one day.
‘You remind me of Donald Duck.’
‘Donald duck is blue. This is yellow!’ She had said.
‘Let me rephrase that then. You look like a duck. The color is bothering me.’
She fumed in anger and stomped out of there. She wore the yellow shirt every week after that just to spite him. He shook his head at her childishness but chuckled at her antic. He got to know her better when she stayed behind, asking him question about the lecture and question about himself. Soon, the affection he had for her grew with time. Both of them cannot deny the lingering feeling they had for each other. He did not agree of a relationship between lecturer and student but he found himself falling for it.
She knew of his true nature, that he was a demon living in a world of human. She told him she was a miko and she had lived in the shrine back then. She also told him that, she did not mind him being a demon.
She had told him that she will help him feel less lonely by going out with him and he had entertained her idea. He found her antics funny and amusing. He had to hand it to her that he had felt more alive than he ever had in years. They went out for dinner and movies together. When they were shopping together, she will replenish his fridge and even picked music CDs for his stereo.
‘I loves this song. It makes me cry every time I listen to it.’
He looked at the CD she held up and to the song she was pointing at. ‘My Valentine by Martina McBride.’
‘You should try listening to it. It’s great.’
He smiled at her and when he got back home, he had listened to it. As he sat there listening to the song, he began to think about their relationship. He will not admit that they are going out on a date. He will always tell himself it was just a friend thing but he knew it was not that simple. He was in denial.
Their relationship took a turn during a stormy night when he was left stranded in the university. Seeing the heavy rain, he decided to remain in the lecture hall, marking papers. Kagome was absent for more than a week now and he wondered what had happened to her. He looked at his cell phone and discarded the idea of calling her. He had wanted to but he did not want to resort to that yet.
His feeling for her was wrong. He was so much older than her. He was even older than her grandfather for heaven sake. His thoughts were disturbed when the door opened to reveal the person he was thinking about. There were black rings under her beautiful eyes.
‘What happened?’
And even if the sun refuses to shine
Even if romance ran out of rhyme
He got up from his seat and rushed to her, holding her arms. She apologized for being absent in his class and that she will be quitting her study. He was devastated at hearing that. He did not want to stop seeing her. She needed to be here. He asked her why. She was being stubborn at first but gave in when he did not take no for an answer.
Her grandfather had entered the hospital recently and had undergone surgery. Her family had to settle the bill now and they cannot do it if she did not quit her study. She wanted to help settle the debt as well and decided that study can wait.
He hugged her then and told her that he will pay for her study and pay for her grandfather’s hospital bill. She was shell-shocked at hearing that. She did not want him to do that. It will cause him a fortune but he did not mind he told her. He had accumulated a lot throughout the year and he wanted to at least use his money for something good if he can help it.
You would still have my heart
Until the end of time
You're all I need
My love, my valentine
She cried then on his chest. The storm had not given way yet and he realized that she was soaked to the bone. He asked her to shed her outer clothing so that she would not catch a cold. She did as he said and shed her jacket off leaving only her yellow shirt. The clothes were clinging to her body. He admired her body from where she sat and berated himself for thinking her in that way.
‘I wanted to touch you.’
She looked up at him when she felt him staring at her. Her eyes were locked with his as words were conveyed between them. She walked over to him and began unbuttoning his shirt.
“I’m cold…Warm me up.” She had said.
His breathing turned into panting as they got down on his desk as he entered her again and again. The storm outside muffled their cries for each other. The door to the hall was not lock and he did not mind being found out of their dirty deed. No, it was not any dirty deed. He loved her and he wanted to be with her always. He will be responsible for her. She gave him her first time and he will treasure it always by remaining faithful for her.
All of my life
I have been waiting for
All you give to me
You've opened my eyes
And showed me how to love unselfishly
He spilled his seed into her and smiled as she accepted him. He willed her to open her eyes, for her to see him. She has the most beautiful eyes ever and he had always remembered it. At that moment, he had decided to settle down, with her by his side. He can already see the future he had planned for the both of them in his mind but the words she said next left him broken.
‘I hope that is enough to pay for the debt I owed you.’
He was shocked and angry at her. Did she just sleep with him so that she could repay him? He hated it. He felt disgusted as he pulled out of her. He felt dirty. He asked her to leave. He did not want to see her anymore and to be reminded of what he did.
She left without a moment of hesitation and when the door of the hall closed, he regretted it. He can smell the tears she shed. The storm had yet to relent and it was still raining heavily. He got up and dresses himself, cleaning up the mess they made before heading out. He searched high and low for her. The rain dampened his sense of smell.
He ran under the rain for an hour before seeing her under the coffee shop they used to go. He ran over to her and hugged her tightly to him, saying sorry repeatedly. She then asked him if he remembered this place. He peered over to the closed shop and nodded.
It was the shop where they had their first outing together. She then told him that, it was the shop where she realized that she had fallen for him. She knew that he did not want a teacher/student relationship and so she did not dare voiced out her feelings for him.
I've dreamed of this a thousand times before
In my dreams I couldn’t love you more
He kissed her to stop her from talking further and told her all he wanted was her and that he will want her to be his forever. Kagome smiled and both of them hugged each other under the fallen rain, never letting each other go. She said sorry as well for saying those stupid words back there. She had never meant for it to be like that. She had wanted him for so long it hurts.
He kissed her cute little nose and carried her back home to his apartment as they consummate their relationship further. He had let her enter his life.
I will give you my heart
Until the end of time
You're all I need
My love, my valentine
She told him that she will not stop seeing him but she will still quit her study to help take care of her grandfather. She promised him that she will continue her study once her grandfather is in better health.
She did not continue her study after 3 years when she got the news that she was carrying his child. She was excited and afraid at the same time. They got carried away during that night. She did not want to tell him about it, fearing that he will not like the news but she can never hide anything from him when he smelled the changes in her.
‘You are pupped.’
Tears flowed down her cheeks as she apologized.
‘Baka…Having a child with you is the greatest thing I can ever have.’
He kissed her forehead and embraced her. They got married soon after and had their first child which they named him Hideki. He was born with silver hair like his father. He looks almost human except for the tail he was born with. Kagome did not mind it as she loves hugging and caressing her son’s furry appendage.
Her husband was delighted with their child. Both of them fought over who got to take care of Hideki all the time though she mostly won due to his work. Soon after, she birthed him three more child, two more boys and one girl.
Sesshoumaru smiled at the thought as he rested his head on the wardrobe. 60 years has passed since then. Their life together was perfect. He did not want her leave just yet. When he got the news that her heart was getting weaker, he was horror stricken. He knew it was time. He had always knew and thought he will be prepared for it. He was so wrong.
The funeral was still on but he cannot stand standing there any longer. He did not want to say goodbye. He was not ready yet. All he wanted was to have his Kagome back, to have her scent envelope him as he sat inside of the wardrobe.
‘What will I do without you Kagome? I do not want to be alone anymore. There is no life after you.’
He collide his fist with the wardrobe back, hitting it repeatedly. He was afraid. He did not know how to spend his time on his own anymore. He kept banging the wardrobe in anger until his fist hit something. Right below, hidden in a mount of clothes, there was a yellow shirt that he recognized it instantly.
‘It was the shirt she wore that night.’
He grabbed it and found that there is something there. Wrapped with the shirt was a book. Kagome’s diary. She was always keeping this thing away from him and he respected it not to read it but now, he wanted nothing more to read what she wrote so that he can get one last chance to be closer to her.
Dear diary,
I knew that my time is coming to depart from this world. I have nothing to regret except leaving my family behind especially my husband, Sesshoumaru. He was everything a woman dream of and having him made me the luckiest woman on Earth. I do not want to leave him. Whenever I think of him being all alone, I could not stand it. I will break his heart.
After 60 years, he still remained youthful like the years had never touched him while I became a graying old lady. Wrinkles and joint pain are my greatest enemies at this age but he still stayed beside me, soothing the pain on my ankle on a stormy night.
Though these stormy nights brought me great pain but I will always remember that evening forever. It felt just like yesterday when I gave myself to you. I will always remember that smile you put all night just for me. I feel special in every way. You never fail to make me feel special every time.
We have gone through up and down over the years. We argued, we quarrel, and we fight over simple matters. I remember saying hurtful things back then and I feel like a fool for doing that. I was young and naïve back then. I’m glad that I have a husband that can put up with me all this time and not leave.
I have had a good life with Sesshoumaru. A good and fulfilling life. He gave me children and a family to care. He had giving me everything. If I was to live my life again, I will do it all over again but this time, I swear I will be a better wife to him. I feel I owed him this much.
Sesshoumaru, I’m currently listening to our song. The song speaks perfectly of our life together. My life is wonderful because of you. I will never trade it with anything else. I will wait for you at heaven’s gate because I will want you by my side then because I’m just selfish like that and I know you love me just the way I am. Please do not be sad when I am gone for I will always be with you. This is just an interlude before we meet again. My heart will stays with you forever until the end of time my love.
Love you lots,
Kagome.
His hands shook as he read her last entry. He smiled at her words while his tears linger free. He closed the diary and hugged the yellow shirt closer to his heart.
‘Even through words, you sounded just the same. I do not mind arguing with you or endure all these hardships with you for I will love you all over again. I have had a good life as well. Please wait for me my love because by your side is where I will stay.’
And even if the sun refuse to shine
Even if romance ran out of rhyme
You would still have my heart
Until the end of time
He rested his head at the back of the wardrobe and closed his eyes as he began to think of her. He saw her behind his mind eyes and smiled as she stood there looking as beautiful as he had remembered.
Cause all I need
Is you, my valentine
Hideki went upstair to look for his father after he disappeared from the crowd. He saw the door to his parents’ room open and walked inside. The place was still like how he had remembered it as a child when he will sleep between his parents when the storm came. His father was stern but he was gentle at the same time. His mother was a kind and caring woman. She can be scary at times as well. He had to say, both of them made great parents.
He smiled as he saw the wardrobe door ajar and knew that his father was inside there again. He missed his mother as well.
“Dad, it’s time for lunch. Come on.” He opened the door and his eyes widen.
Sesshoumaru was smiling as he lay there motionless, clutching to the yellow shirt that belonged to Kagome. He looks happy.
You're all I need
My love, my valentine