And the Journey Begins ^-^....well the Journy to Sesshoumaru's Shiro at least....but the start of a new chapter in the story of Sesshoumaru and Kagome no? ^-^
I like this story very much. I've two bits of advice for you.
You have your 'there' 'their' and 'they're' mixed up. There- location. Ex. Will you move this bag over there for me, please? Their- possesive. Ex. Their bag is the big yellow one. They're- They-are. Ex. They're not going to admit it, but they like the leather bag better.
You also have some places where you're lacking comma usage. Commas when talking to a person and their name is invovled. Ex.1 "Kags, can you help me over here?" Ex.2 "Damn it, Kags!"
These bits of advice will give you better flow.
Meow (Chapter 15) - Thu 12 Jul 2012
Great Story! I was a little disapointed in the beginning, wondering when sesshomaru was going to comw into play! But damn that was awesome! Guess im just used to stories jumping right in but yours is more of like a book and actual storyline. You explain everything and your story just gushes awesome sauce. Looking forward to more from you! ^.^
*poir kagome and her broken ribs... I hope we qet to see some sessh/kaqz action in the nextfew chaps...
Still cant believe your story line. It's simple awe inspiring...
About your dog.. You can't train a dog to slowly as far as I know.. My grid has a dog and I swear, whenever we give him some steak or some type I meat to eat, he doesn't even chew.. He swallows! Its nO wonder why they never give him nummy food.. He doesn't even cherish it anymore.. Lol.. Such a funny sight to see though*
*ok... What the hell is wrong with you...! Your so good at manipulating your stories.. I use the word manipulate because there are a lot of rendition to your stories or genres that you pick, yet your so goog at making it yours..Such talent and at such a young age aswell...
Job well done.. I do hope you continue your other stories... Such good plots to just leave themjo complete..
keep up the good work!*
I
Nyuka (Chapter 14) - Thu 24 May 2012
O.O Inuyasha SUBMITTED....that is both increadible and a long time coming ^-^ glad Kagome finaly gots him under her thumb...urrr paw?
^-^ Nyuka
cute! i love them bickering!
Another great chapter! :D I'm super excited to read what happens next!
Lovely chapter as always! I can't wait for more! :)
Nyuka (Chapter 11) - Tue 08 May 2012
Darn it all I hate it when I reach the last chapter of really AWESOME stories ^-^ and this really is one....I have this forboding feeling that I'm going to end up thinking about his this story constently ^-^' I love what you have done to Kagome...She is like super cool and stuff, Sesshomaru is a little OOC but not enough from me to care, actruly I would probably be more upset if he acted any differently.
LOVE THIS STORY!!!!!
Nyuka
I am absolutely loving this story! It is simply wonderful! I hope Kagome will still be able to use all of her powers--she was just too amazing as a huge motherly inu :gushes: In any case, I can't wait for the next update! Thank you for riting such a wonderful story for us. ^___^
I have to point out one small spelling error in this chapter.... just because of the huge difference it makes
In this couple of sentences-----
Cyan gasped at the demon lord. It had only been a few hours since the weird feelings from that moment by the bowel, when Kagome had collapsed.
You might want to change bowel to bowl.... because the bowel is the lower intestine of the body (hence the term bowel movement for ridding the body of waste) and it makes this very .... interesting of a place to be... *giggles*
Pricila (Chapter 11) - Mon 07 May 2012
Yeah, he came to her rescue! I completely love this chapter and though she is ill and he has barely recovered; the interaction was beautiful and intimate. I want more!! Can't wait for the next chapter.
Pricila (Chapter 10) - Sun 06 May 2012
Great, awesome, excellent chapter!!! That's some power Kags got. I wonder if Sessh will wake to find Kags still passed out. He just got sick so shld heal rather fast; I hope!
O_O you are so awesome and evil for that cliffee dangit! MORE!
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