It is really good start, the plot is very enticing to continue reading. You have my full attention and desire to follow you in this new fantastic road. Carry on and give your best.
Hi dear, thank you so much for taking out your time to write this wonderful fanfiction. The story is great and very well written.
But there's just this one problem. This is from ch 1, "She decided against taking her yellow backpack with her, knowing that it wouldn't be of any use of her in the past.
Sure, she could take some food or a sleeping math with her but in the end, she could just as well hunt her own food and sleep in Kaede's hut as she had done countless of times before. It would only serve her as a hindrance."
This is from Ch 3, "She kicked the blankets off of her body and stood up before she grabbed her yellow backpack and packed her belongings as well as some food for her journey." And so on.
Honestly it is smart to take the bag coz she should know how dangerous and difficult life is in the Fudal Era. Maybe not a change of clothes but it helps to get medical care and matches and blanket at difficult times. Changing that line in the first chapter should do the trick, buuuuut it is clear in chapter three that she left everything behind. Will Sesshoumaru pick them up? Destroy them or just leave them behind.
Anyway, other than that, awesome work dear. Waiting for the next installment ^_^
Exciting!!! <3
VS (Chapter 2) - Fri 20 Apr 2018
Hello,
you did really well with this chapter!
You picked up a very dramatic time for Kagome to appear. Toga is already dead and Inuyasha was killed nearly twice on the day he was born: first by the cold and then by Sesshoumaru. I like the way you describe Izayoi as a loving mother and wife! And I even like more your characterization of Sesshoumaru!!! Many focus only on Inuyasha and forget that for his elder brother this day was also the beginning of hardship - he may need Kagome even more than Inuyasha!!!
Although we encounter a lot of danger and even death in this chapter, it is not too overhelming, because you know how to break the tension a bit by the use small funny moments/jokes!!!
Well done!
I hope you will continue this fic, it would be a shame to abandon it!
You seem to be talented and your story shows much potential!!!
I look forward ro your next update!!!
VS (Chapter 1) - Fri 20 Apr 2018
Hello,
I have to compliment you for the first chapter! It is very well written, and more important: you capture the interst of any reader. Your description of Kagomes and Sakis emotions is absolut authentic!!!
I'm excited to read who Saki is...
This was a very nice chapter. Again, it was well written except for what could be a grammatical error with the use of the word 'expect' in relation to a future event that was expected to happen. In your sentence:
(They looked so peaceful, blissfully unaware of all the pain and hurt that would expect them in the years coming.)
You may consider the word await in place of expect.
I have always wondered why Toga did not take Izayoi and place her in a safe place, at least, while she was pregnant. He had to have known the possibilities of aggression toward her and their child because of their relationship. I think that if he had, then the outcome would have been a whole lot different. He may have lived.
I am looking forward to the future chapters that awaits us.
Thanks for the update.
Excellent writing!!!
I do I love how you started.it and would like to see where it' going
Pfairy (Chapter 1) - Thu 07 Dec 2017
What a great start. Looking forward to reading more!
Lutos (Chapter 1) - Mon 04 Dec 2017
Fantastic!
hope to read more of this story.
Jackie (Chapter 1) - Mon 04 Dec 2017
This is absolutely fantastic ! I never, repeat- never review stories - and i have read sooooooo many inuyasha fics -( in particular) i, like your other reviewers love the further back in time fics- you truly have a talent- i loved the museum and the vivid detail and i am interested in what other artifacts are in it, but only time will tell- honestly this story could be one of the greats and i look forward to more - cheers !!
I believe that I am going to love reading this story. It has piqued my interest just from the summary alone.
I love the plotlines where Kagome goes further back in time and meets a younger Sesshomaru. I look forward to reading about what Fate has in store for Kagome and what her purpose is that warrants her going that far back in time...possibly to help Sessho in someway to cope and not become the cold hearted demon he becomes after the death of his father and the birth of Inuyasha. I know it is more than that but maybe she and Sessho are destined to fall in love and change the future...just a couple of guesses.
The tour guide at the museum is intriguing. She seems to know what lies in store for Kagome's future. I wonder if she has a connection to Sessho and Inuyasha's bloodline since she seems to have their eye color. Or maybe she could be a messenger to one of the kamis' or the Fates.
It is very nicely written with a few grammatical errors that did not interrupt the flow of the story.
And I hope you keep it going and not abandon it like a lot of other writers do with their fantastic stories.
Looking forward to future chapters. You did a great job!!!
Cheers!!!
Natalia (Chapter 1) - Sun 03 Dec 2017
I love further back time travelling fics!
I am curious how you'll spin this.
I love long chapters but honestly I couldn't wait to get to her jumping in the well. And the story at the museum was so detailed! I wonder who that tour guide is?
Update soon!
Brandie (Chapter 1) - Sun 03 Dec 2017
Please update soon I can't wait to read more
Toni (Chapter 1) - Sun 03 Dec 2017
really like it can't wait for the next chapters
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