While I don't usually like mixed history in this fandom, it's only my opinion, I like the canon and not mixing it with Egyptian or Greek but that's just me. This one though made me curious! Only one observation, it's a pet peeve of mine, sorry it's not meant as disrespect, while writing historical work don't use modern verbatim. They didn't use ok or cool back then. A priestess especially wouldn't say okay to a god!
Another thing I didn't really understand, it confused me. Where you say he taught her many new things and not just what the Pharaohs wanted?
Quote: Besides that he had taught her the true history of her people and just what the pharaohs had wanted the people to know. She didn't think less of the previous rulers of her homeland, but it helped her to understand why traditions were the way they were.
It's a little confusing!
In rest good luck! Curious how you'll spin this!
OMG I'm so In love with your story already!!!! Please update soon this is an amazing start! Can't wait to see where you take this!
Saya (Chapter 1) - Thu 28 Sep 2017
Wow! I'm loving this already! You put a lot of work into this. Looking forward for the next chapter.
I am intrigued by this story. It caught my attention and would like to read more. It was very nicely written. I hope you update it soon and I will be looking for future postings. Keep it going...it is off to a good start. It is something different. Excellent job!!!
Page 3 of 3
| | | |